I feel better. It all feels better. God hears my cry and he answers my prayers... This is teaching me how to put my trust in him. He got me a job.. a swim instructing job that pays very well.. 400 a week for just a 2 hours a day. Its so beautiful I can't even put it into words. I will have some money to buy everything for the pageant. And to pay the fees if I wont be able to find a sponsor. But I feel it.. I feel like this is happening for a reason and I need to be stronger. I need to want this even more. I need to strive with my everything. I need to ask for help more. I know I can do this. Its a month away I have my best friend, a job, my workout videos, and everything I need here. I got this. And I am going to do this. It's such a big step to what I want in life and not everything will be perfect. The best things happen when we are not ready. and I need to continue trusting God and know that he won't leave me and allready has a plan for me.